June 5, 2011 God answered

Ya know it's so weird to think that I am 43 and I have no real career, no children, no husband, no home (RV does not count as a home), no cause I run around the world fighting for, no money, no big dreams of having any either. Oh and I have no ass! I lost it in a poker game lol. No really. A car accident did a number on me.
Yet I'm fairly content. I don't want anything i don't have. Accept maybe a little more happiness. A daily dose of utter joy would be good. Yet I don't really know what would make me Happier other than more love and family in my life.
I miss my cousins, family Christmas's, sleep overs with girlfriends and roller skating.
This older man at work the other day said "ya know what the worse part of getting old is?.....getting old!"
I think the bottom line for me Is I don't want to grow old alone. That's my fear. I used to fear dying of a violent death. Now I fear dying old and lonely.
God will see to it that I am where I should be. I trust him.

I found this in my phone journal....